It’s gay. Totally Gay.
You so got to have to watch the latest flopbuster Cicak-Man. My friend, Debbie, was right, it could be so bad that it’s good. Jerry concured.
In my earlier post, I speculated (from watching the trailer) that Cicak-Man ‘borrowed’ a lot of things from Spider-Man, Matrix Reloaded, Bat Man and Superman. But if you watch the movie, you will learn that the movie is also quite Brokeback Mountain. I am not gonna tell you more here. You gotta watch it yourself…
Since we have no local precedence and we like to compare ourselves with African and some god forsaken countries, I would say this movie is the “bestest” local movie ever.
Learnt a few things from the movie (didn’t know that it can be educational too!):
1. Be nice to a beautiful girl and she will fall in love with you easily. Look at Tania, she liked Hairi at the train station and then fell in love with Danny when he walked her home. Is she a slut or what?
2. The bestest pick up line: Have a chewing gum, research says it will help you to reduce stress. (No wonder Danny didn’t get laid in the movie)
3. Don’t say anything like “I will take care of you until I die” to your best friend. It looks and sounds really gay. Well, unless you’re gay, if you’re not, I would advise against it.
4. If you pretend that you’re in a temperate country when you are not, please use tissue paper to wipe the sweat off.
5. Nestle is going to run out of business. Lizard makes coffee taste better, not coffeemate.
6. Don’t buy any property in Putrajaya. When you walk home, you’re outside a row of beautiful houses. When you step in, you are in an apartment.
7. You only need a Dell (look like a Dell) notebook to run DNA sequencing, a conical flask with some coloured liquid in it with a tube coming out from the mouth of the flask, two lizards and perhaps a bunsen burner. Ta dar! You just found the antidote for Cicak-Man.
8. If you are taking drugs or antidote, please use plastic syringe. It won’t break if it falls.
9. Cloning a human is as easy as pressing the copy button of a 20 year-old xerox machine. You just have a cacat copy.
10. “Exhaust” fan sucks, not blows. This is what I call “reverse” engineering. And the control of the fan will be right beside you when you need it.
[…] related reads: • Sam’s Review 分類: Filmology 影視講非, English 英文記事 • at 5:23 am on December 23, 2006 • […]
oh my, i really must go see this train wreck
hahahaha. this is soooooooo funny. we have a captain barbel the movie too. and supernoypi. so i can understand how this movie sucks. i’m rolling on the floor in laughter. i totally love number 3! hahahaha
wanna highlight number 4 & 7 also… the science fiction part is totally not making sense, we don’t use microscope to examine viruses or looking for vaccine, we don’t see things like what Hairi see under microscope. this is not B-grade movie, C-grade perhaps.
btw, rule no. 1 in ANY lab: never eat or drink in a lab, especially on working bench!
*the term of ‘microscope’ is refer to ‘normal light microscope’ which u can even find it in any secondary school’s lab.
shag: wait for th.th.th.th the clear copy DVD… don’t bother about the movie.
ya small screen is better. the true High Definition can see digital noise (like your digi photo when light is not enough) one on big screen.
i can’t find hte DVD
oh ya hor… perhaps it is too bad till the DVD fellas don wanna make a copy. hahaha… this is just pure speculation only.
[…] JerryWho has given his review, so as sam. And now I am giving mine, here in Nerdy Science Blog. […]
[…] Cicak-man: The Lizardman’s Plight. @ 乱语胡言。 It’s gay. Totally Gay. @ 顺水顺川。 […]
[…] When I was primary school, I visited my grandparents place, which is a 100-yo Chinese shop house, during every school holidays. Unlike the Bok House, my grandparents’ house is still intact even they were long gone. My uncles and aunt stay there now. I remember one night when my grandmother was stir frying bean sprouts with half fat pork slices, a lizard fell into her wok. Of course she did not realise until I put it in my mouth. Yes, I ate half of the head-less, tail-less and leg-less cicak. Yikes! However, I did not wake up at the ceiling the next day. Jesus… how I wished I turned into Cicak Man then. With that, I can rob our filthy rich Town Councillors and give the money to the poor farmers up north and flood victims down south. And I can take Keluang Man as my side kick since he does not do well after his many years of appearance on TV. […]
[…] has given his review, so as sam. And now I am giving mine, here in Nerdy Science […]